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4.11. DNR...

Dear Grandpa 親愛的爺爺,

Our response to the no-doubt difficult DNR decision before you is nothing but love, and great respect. You have been a role model to all of us, stern yet loving, wise but playful. You and grandma gave us the best Chinese New Year memories year after year, even now, when we return to Pingtung with children in tow, and you continue to create for us happy memories to cherish for a lifetime. We will always have the pebble-stoned beaches, the aboriginal culture museum, grandma's rice balls and pigfeet soup, all the good times--that love is forever part of us.

您一直是我們的楷模,剛毅兼關懷,智慧中帶幽默.您與阿嬤給了我們最溫馨的童年回憶,從小到大每年都如此. 如今我們帶著小朋友一起會去過年,他們也一樣有許多他們將珍惜一輩子的快樂回憶. 我們永遠都記得,在海邊玩水,原住民博物館,阿嬤美味飯糰與豬腳麵線--一切愛的片段烙在我們腦海裡.

One thing not many people in our family know: when my mother coded in the ICU and the doctor wanted us to sign the DNR papers, a "family friend" who was not family and we barely knew, who had become a recipient of confidential information after helping translate what doctors said for my father, violated HIPAA and told everybody in my mother's (southern Californian, Taiwanese) community about the DNR status being recommended.

My family and I then received call after call from complete strangers (to us) that were friends of our mother's. With no understanding of her wishes, her prognosis or the extreme measures already taken, these people pleaded with us to "give her another chance," to "please do not let her die," and so on. This made an already difficult decision and situation even harder, and certainly delayed the entire matter as well as transition to comfort care for days, during which my mother was kept at a level of sedation/anesthesia that would not have left her pain-free because she had to be checked for reflexes (which she was not displaying) and signs of improvement every few hours.

We want love, and respect, and all the best things possible for you, Grandpa. We miss you so much, all the way from California, US, to Pingtung, Taiwan. And we love you. Forever and ever.


伊敏 敬上


  1. 疼阮的阿公、阿祖:

    你一直是阮的模範,堅強閣充滿疼心,智慧閣gâu滾笑。你和阿嬤戶阮上溫暖的童年回憶。從小漢到大漢逐冬攏是按呢。今阮帶阮的囡仔倒去過年,in也相像,有真chōe 戶in一世人會記得的快樂回憶。阮永遠會記得,在海邊耍水,去原住民博物館,阿嬤做的真好吃的飯糰及豬腳麵線;一段一段疼的回憶,刻著在阮腦海裡。

    阿公,我們愛您,也真數念您,從加州一路 數念到屏東,直到永遠 。

    伊敏 敬上

    1. Thank you! Very nice translation. Funny how the Taiwanese word for "love" is "pain." That sounds about right.

  2. No words to give. I'm only sending love. ❤


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