Week 6. EtOh = Alcohol
In honor of the weekend (and no invisible planet hitting us today), here's a really-quite-serious, "How drunk are you?" quiz based on how pickled your brain feels (loosely adapted from Table 38-1 in Lehne's Pharmacology for Nursing Care, 9th ed.)
1. Increased confidence? Euphoria, decreased inhibitions? Congratulations, the alcohol has reached your frontal lobe. Blood alcohol approximately 0.05%.
2. Loquacious? Judgement altered? Your frontal lobe continues to be affected, and you are now at or past the legal limit of intoxication, 0.08%.
3. Tremors? Involuntary body movements? Reduced attention? Your parietal lobe's been breached. 0.15%.
4. Reduced motor skills? Slurred speech? Parietal lobe conquered at 0.2%.
5. Altered perception? Double vision? The occipital lobe's getting pickled, 0.25%.
6. Altered equilibrium? There goes your cerebellum. 0.3%.
7. Feeling apathetic? Inert? In a stupor? Really shouldn't continue, because you're down to the diencephalon, your reptile brain, and when blood alcohol exceeds 0.4%, which it will have by now, a substantial risk of respiratory depression arises. Respiratory depression: not breathing while depressed (which we all do), but rather, starting to forget how and how. often. to. breathe.
8. Do not enter zone. By 0.5%, the medulla gives in, which is just to say: peripheral collapse, coma, possible death.
2. Loquacious? Judgement altered? Your frontal lobe continues to be affected, and you are now at or past the legal limit of intoxication, 0.08%.
3. Tremors? Involuntary body movements? Reduced attention? Your parietal lobe's been breached. 0.15%.
4. Reduced motor skills? Slurred speech? Parietal lobe conquered at 0.2%.
5. Altered perception? Double vision? The occipital lobe's getting pickled, 0.25%.
6. Altered equilibrium? There goes your cerebellum. 0.3%.
7. Feeling apathetic? Inert? In a stupor? Really shouldn't continue, because you're down to the diencephalon, your reptile brain, and when blood alcohol exceeds 0.4%, which it will have by now, a substantial risk of respiratory depression arises. Respiratory depression: not breathing while depressed (which we all do), but rather, starting to forget how and how. often. to. breathe.
8. Do not enter zone. By 0.5%, the medulla gives in, which is just to say: peripheral collapse, coma, possible death.
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